2020 - The Year of the Portrait... maybe...

At the end of 2019 I was feeling pretty defeated. I had been laid off from my job as a product photographer and creatively I was in a serious funk. No form of photography interested me. I’d sit in my apartment trying to think of a project and nothing I came up with really spoke to me. Urban wildlife? I’ve done that. Look at my Instagram and you’ll see plenty of pigeons, the occasional hawk, squirrels, a dead rat… I’m not convinced people are too interested in seeing that sort of thing at this point. Every other idea I had I knew there were other people doing it and were successful. Photographing and speaking to random people on the street - People of New York already exists and I wasn’t too interested in speaking with strangers. Photographing random dogs on the street - The Dogist is doing that and I already photograph plenty of dogs. Everything else I thought of required a studio, which I don’t have. That mindset changed on December 25th of 2019.

For Christmas in 2019 I accompanied my girlfriend to her family’s home in DC. It was suggested to me that I create an Amazon wishlist of small items I might want for Christmas. I haven’t asked for anything for Christmas in almost 20 years so I had no idea what to do. I certainly couldn’t ask for a 1DX Mark III or an 800mm lens, which are items I legitimately want but it might be a little rude asking for almost $20,000 worth of items. So I started browsing the photography department to see if there were fun little accessories I could use. I came across a book called Studio Anywhere by Nick Fancher and I read a quick preview. It seemed pretty neat, the concept was that instead of renting or owning a studio you have a little portable studio that you can travel with. Surely I would need to buy more equipment I couldn’t afford but it might be an interesting read anyway. Fast forward to Christmas and Clare’s parents are kind enough to get the book for me and in the evening I started reading. The introduction might as well been my autobiography.

The book opens talking about how we all wish we had ideal conditions. A 5,000 square foot studio in NYC, top of the line equipment, more assistants than you know what to do with, the works. He goes on to describe the reality which perfectly mirrored my exact situation. I’ve got an old camera body I bought used and two high quality lenses that took forever to save up for, along with a few other very specific descriptors that apply to my life. He later shares a list of equipment he used for all the photographs found in the book and it mostly matched my own equipment, save for a few affordable additions. I immediately flipped through the whole book looking at the photos thing “No way, he’s lying.” To my surprise he shared a few behind the scenes photos as well. My understanding of what could be done immediately changed. I don’t need a studio, I don’t need expensive equipment. Like Tim Gunn says, I just need to make it work.

I’ve done portraits before but it was never something I advertised. When someone approached me looking for portraits I’d temper expectations, knowing I’d have to deal with conditions far from ideal. There was only one time in the last few years where I had access to lights and it was when I worked my friend Alex Fischer to photograph lawyers at a firm.

Looking back, there are a lot of things I’d change about these photos and I’d edit them completely differently. I think the depth of field is far too shallow and the client’s skin may be affected by the wall color just a bit much. They’re still serviceable photos and the client still uses these pictures years later.

Most of the time when I was asked to photograph portraits I requested we do it outside. While light indoors is easier to control, the lighting indoors is often unflattering and too dim to get the quality I want. There was one day when I was asked to photograph a series of young professionals who were in the city for a conference. We had access to Bloomingdale’s for some reason and I was asked we photograph the portraits inside. I hated that idea but it’s what they wanted, it made no sense to me. I did what they asked, I had no option anyway, it was raining outside. Then suddenly the rain stopped and the sun came out. I gathered my subjects and said “Round 2, follow me outside” and I redid the portraits, knowing the wetness outside would create some really great soft light.

The results speak for themselves. The client liked these photos much more than the Bloomingdale’s photos and I didn’t even add those photos to my portfolio, they’ve been lost to time. From then on all I but refused to do interior portraits unless I could also bring the client outside for what I considered to be better photos.

When I started reading Studio Anywhere and realized I was just a few items away from matching Nick Francher’s exact gear load out. I did a bit of shopping and found items that suited my photographic style and pulled the trigger on attempting to make a serious effort in photographing portraits. My first test images were with my girlfriend, Clare.

Clare O’Sullivan - @ccosul on Instagram

Clare O’Sullivan - @ccosul on Instagram

This photograph was taken in haste, I hurried through setting up my new gear, throwing up a few yards of black velvet on the wall, and asked Clare to pose for me. I took maybe 6 pictures before I dismissed her and checked out the photos in Lightroom. I honestly couldn’t believe it was taken in my living room. It wasn’t perfect but it was far better than I anticipated. I knew I had to do more but I had no subjects. So I tried myself.

My large head

My large head

I look a mess and immediately went and trimmed my beard after this photo but I was surprised once again with the quality. Desperate for more subjects I began messaging friends “Hey, let me photograph you.” “Do you have time on a lunch break or anything?” “Yo! I know we haven’t talked in a while but let me take your picture!”

Camille Harris - jazz musician, comedian, entertainer

Camille Harris - jazz musician, comedian, entertainer

With this photo I thought the background didn’t really match the emotion of the subject. It’s white leaning toward grey, it didn’t really work for me but my options were either black or white. Then I realized I could probably Photoshop the background to a more appropriate color…

Camille Blue.jpg

Then I thought “I wonder if I can get more expressive with the lights themselves?” I have a background in lighting, I’m sure I can make something happen.

Stephanie Fagan - actor, podcaster (That’s The Spirit!)

Stephanie Fagan - actor, podcaster (That’s The Spirit!)

My mind as been moving at a million miles an hour since January. All I want to do is sit people down in front of me, play with my lights, and take pictures. I’m finally having fun again. Last year I did maybe 10 portraits, tops. This year, I hope to do 100, 200, 300, all I can think about is portraits. How to get more clients, different lighting set ups, how I can further improve my editing. And honestly, it’s all thanks to this little ~200 page book.

My most recent portrait for a professional’s profile

My most recent portrait for a professional’s profile

If you are looking for a portrait photographer then you can look no further. Email me today at contact@sdconrad.com for rates and to book your appointment. The studio comes to you!

2016 Year in Review

It's en vogue to trash on 2016 right now.  A spat of celebrity deaths to end the year, plus numerous notable deaths throughout, along with an unsavory American presidential election have lead to dozens of trending hashtags declaring 2016 to be the worst ever.  And while 2016 has put me through some of my more devastating hardships, it hasn't passed without awarding me my greatest triumphs.

The triumphs would not be possible without some people in my life.  I experienced possibly the worst financial troubles I've ever had to face and I have had to rely on the love and charity of others to get me through.  My gratitude has reached levels nearing shame for having to rely so heavily on my loved ones.  I shall keep them nameless as their acts were not done for public recognition but were done out of the kindness of their hearts.  Much of my adult life was spent believing myself to be lonely and unloved, my shame derives from being proven wrong.  I am not lonely nor am I unloved.  I am humbled and eternally grateful.  My goal for 2017 is to be more like the people around me showing me their love.  I can't continue to live in the darkness.  I have to live by their example and carry the light.

2016 saw the end of my freelance career.  Well, full time freelance at least.  I took a full time job photographing jewelry.  In an age where the staff photographer position is hard to come by, I lept at the opportunity to fulfill that role.  Photographing jewelry was something I had no experience doing but I somehow weaseled my way in to the gig.  I struggled at first, but now I am proud of the work I do there.  While it's a small family run operation some of our clients include Sears, David's Bridal, and a number of other major retail chains throughout the US.  Using my experience there I applied for my dream job at a big name company in the online box subscription world.  I was confident in how I interviewed and my inside man told me they loved me.  In the phone interview they even talked about salary and benefits, which to me was a clue they had me pegged as a candidate.  I was right, but they didn't pick me.  Unfortunately, they selected a candidate who had interviewed before me.  Not because they liked them more, and not because they didn't like me enough, it was simply because they wanted to go with their first instinct.  While I was devastated I go on knowing I am capable of working for larger companies.  I have taken this confidence and I am putting more effort in my current job.  I hope to leave massive shoes to fill once I move on.
 


In 2015 I attended an NYCFC game and wondered how I get on the pitch to photograph a game.  So, I set a goal - photograph an NYCFC game.  But I had no idea how to do that.  Then one day I saw an ad posted on CraigsList - Wanted: photographer for local amateur soccer league.  Perfect!  I can build a portfolio of amateur soccer and use it to get myself a job photographing the pro game.  I managed to land the gig and began shooting.  Soccer is a lot more difficult to photograph than I imagined, especially when kickoff isn't until 10pm.  I needed the power of the sun to pull off what I truly wanted.  But, as it turns out, proving I could do it at night is exactly what I needed.  I answered another ad looking sports photographers.  Turns out they recently got credential approval for MLS and I could start shooting the 2016 season with the NYCFC pre-season press conference on Thursday followed by game 1 on Saturday.  Strangely, my first day of my new day job was Wednesday.  I found out I got both of these gigs on the very same day.  I had also met my girlfriend's parents earlier in the week and they seemed to like me too so overall, March 2016 was a great month.


2016 has set a high bar for 2017.  I hope my worst financial crises are behind me and I hope my greatest achievements are ahead of me.  I am gearing up to launch my e-commerce page to start selling prints.  I plan on shooting more weddings, as I've done two in 2016 and feel great about them.  I will shoot more amateur and pro soccer.  I will continue doing my best at my day job but will keep my eyes out for bigger fish to fry.  

Say what you want about 2016 but I'd do the whole thing all over again.